While he understands sex terminology, he can be naive at other times. A teacher asks her class, What do you want to be when you grow up? Little Johnny says I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best b*tch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day. The boy greets him by saying, I know the whole truth. The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, Then come give your Daddy a great big hug!, Check out 20 Really Funny School Jokes that will make you laugh, 7. 53+ Funny Quotes by Famous People 2023 (laugh-out-loud! 'Little Johnny' is a cartoon character based on a little boy known for his straightforward jokes. Previous joke A Man Was Driving Along The Motorway. Little Johnny says I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best bitch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day. Little Johnny's dad asks him if he knows about the birds and the bees. This is my only account so please make sure to smash that subscribe button! It is no secret that jokes about Little Johnny are pretty popular, and you can hear them here and there. KICKASS BEEF JERKY Dirty little Johnny Jokes 232,935 views Jan 24, 2021 7.6K Dislike Share Jeremy Littel 520K subscribers Welcome to my page the official page of Jeremy Littel. Here are more jokes to give you more giggles and laughter: Best Dad Jokes - the Good, the Bad, the Terrible, Fun Game: Jokes and Riddles Conversation Starters. GOD ALMIGHTY! shouted April and the teacher said, Very good and April fell back asleep. Teacher: If you got ten dollars from ten people, what would you have? Johnny: A new bike. Favorite pets: dog, bumble bee named Maxo, a butterfly named as Redwing and the lizard named as Notail Mother: Johnny, how far have you gotten with your work? Saturday. email addresses were disqulified from the list and couldn't be sent. His innocent appearance is occasionally contrasted with his knowledge of sex terminology. Legendarily naughty Little Johnny sat in class quietly as the students were composing a poem with their teacher. He was an electrician.An electrician? Asked the teacher, who was perplexed.Yeah, here. Great, that has three syllables. And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. Thousands of clean and dirty Where on earth did you pick it up?From my father. said Johnny.Well, he should be ashamed of himself. Sadly, the baby was born without any ears.When the mum and baby came back home from the hospital, Johnnys family was invited over to see the baby. I have another pair at home exactly the same." Little Johnny was doing his maths homework. Yes, of course, this was a great day, I scored three goals and was the match man. I went home with it and came back with it this morning.Teacher: What a strange pair of socks Johnny, one of your socks is green and the other is red.Johnny: Yes, it is very strange. Little Johnny Jokes That Make You Laugh Jokes To Tell Your Friends. Little Johnny: Well, about six miles., Sunday school teacher asked Little Johnny, Do you believe in the Devil? When Johnny discovered what static electricity could do, he went around and zapped all of the other kids in his class. Joke #6837. Johnny tried to buy a toy car with monopoly money at the store.The cashier said, Theres no way I can take this. Eddie Got Funny Jokes 105K subscribers Subscribe 37K views 1 year ago #jokes #trynottolaugh #joke. Listen carefully. It means the car wont start.. And she said we should recite it till we learned it! The next day his mother went to the teacher to complain. His mom replies, "Never mind what you think! Little Johnny decided to dress up as a pirate for Halloween.When he went trick-or-treating, one of the adults asked him, Where are your buccaneers?Johnny whispered, Theyre under my buckin eye patch.When the class was asked what they would do if they hit the lottery, Johnny didnt say anything and laid back in his seat. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. "Hey, Mum," asked Little Johnny, . Next - 25 Little Johnny Jokes. In one post, it would be impossible to put all the jokes about little Johnny together. I have another pair at home exactly the same.Little Johnny was doing his maths homework. Crunt? Ever miss going to school? Then Johnny replies, But why does mommy have to deflate it when Ms. Jane next door just comes over every day to blow it back up?, Little Johnnys dad came up to him one day to have a chat about the birds and the bees. Thats it! Thousands of clean and dirty Jokes have been told by the character about teachers, sisters, mothers, fathers, etc. Little Johnny looks at his father and says, Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?, A teacher asks her class, What do you want to be when you grow up?. Knowing Johnny's more mature sense of humor she picks Mike instead. By clicking Accept All, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. "My dad owns a farm too. Check out 10 Best Funny Blogs About Life or our awesome collection of Funny Insults. The cashier said, Theres no way I can take this. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics". Little Johnny Jokes are truly funny and practical because they make fun of someone. Little Johnny pokes her in the ass with a pin and she yells Jesus Christ! And falls back to sleep.A little while later the teacher asks Sally who created our world. SHARE. Little Johnny was asked to use the pronoun I in a sentence. You are signed up for our newsletter! Why are geologists good at stand up comedy? Quickly, dad tells him to leave.When mom and dad come out of the room, they explain to Johnny that sometimes daddys get a big tummy and mommys have to jump on it so it will deflate.Then Johnny replies, But why does mommy have to deflate it when Ms. Jane next door just comes over every day to blow it back up?Little Johnny walked into class every morning with a black eye.After a few days of this happening, the teacher became very worried and asked him about it.Johnnys answer was: Our house is very small Miss. See our other funny jokes too including more little Johnny jokes. I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, who I hope to introduce you to after dinner.. 5. A while later, the teacher asked April, Who is our Lord and Savior?. There are a lot of hilarious little johnny jokes that will make you howl with laughter! We share them in our weekly newsletter. Johnny said, Mommy said that well be loaded when you croak.. Just go to school." He says: "Last night Fred came to my room for the Vaseline and I think I gave him my airplane glue.". Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends! Later that evening, as Johnnys mother cooks dinner, a cockroach run across the kitchen floor. Can I see her?, Johnny: Nope. One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. To prove it, sometimes they would offer Johnny his choice between a nickel (5 cents) and a dime (10 cents) and John would always take the nickel they said, because it was bigger.One day after John grabbed the nickel, the store owner took him aside and said Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. But if your boobs were bigger, youd be a 9.Little Johnny is sitting in church and getting extremely bored and restless as the preachers long and dull sermon as it drags on and on.Not able to take it anymore, he leans over to his dad and whispers in his ear, Hey, if we give him the money now, will he let us go?Little Johnny was struggling with his school grades. Check out funny Little Johnny jokes we have found for you. I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope to introduce to you after dinner.Little Johnny is walking down the street and sees a construction site building new housesHe has a look at whats going on and hes amazed and in awe of it all. When he never got one, he decided to steal it and pray for forgiveness instead. Hes a burglar.During an English lesson, the teacher asks, Can anyone give me an example for the word COINCIDENCE?Little Johnny volunteers, Sir, my mum and dad were married on the same day.Little Johnny comes proudly to his mom: Mom, Ive got a great idea for an invention!Mom: Cool, tell me.Johnny: Its a computerized hair-cutting machine. But April didnt even stir from her slumber. The teacher decided to teach the children in her class how to count. He shot 70 with his machine gun, but then he ran out of bullets! Proverb: work is not a rabbit, does not run. Im waiting for my secretary.Mom and dad are having sex when little Johnny walks in. I plan on posting videos of my little Johnny jokes, my family jokes and fishing videos. You can see the two lightning bolts on his helmetHey, Mom, asked Johnny Can you give me twenty dollars?Certainly not.If you do, he went on, Ill tell you what dad said to the maid when you were at the beauty shop.His mothers ears perked up and, grabbing her purse, she handed over the money. Just go to school. A young female teacher was giving her class of six year olds a quiz behind my back Ive got something red, round and you can eat it. She said: This essay youve written about your pet dog is exactly the same essay your brother has written. Of course it is. said Johnny. Johnny said, "It had to be! At times he is well educated in the terminology of sex, while at others he is all too innocent. Teacher: If you had one dollar and you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you have? Johnny: One dollar. Teacher: You dont know your arithmetic. Johnny: And you dont know my father!, 18. When his Dad came home Johnny said, Dad our rooster is dead and his legs are sticking in the air. The following day the teacher asks for the first volunteer to tell their story. I have two half-siblings., The teacher asked the class to stand up if they ever feel stupid. Love sharing with your friends and family? regular teacher. Little Johnny walks into school one day to find a substitute in place of his regular teacher.She says, Hello class, Im Mrs Prussy. His mom replies, Never mind what you think! Working motivation: none. 6. He says out loud, One plus six, that son of a bitch is seven. Dad said I could have anything I wanted as long as I didnt tell the family. I covered it with peanut butter and he woofed it down.There was a little boy named Johnny who used to hang out at the local corner market. Little Johnny was overheard by his mother reciting his homework, Two plus two, the son of a b*tch is four; four plus four, the son of a b*tch is eight; eight plus eight, the son of a b*tch; Johnny! shouted his mother. shouted April and the teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back asleep. Little Johnny comes home from sunday school with a black eye. Do you know who created Little Johnny jokes? He wanted to freak out his parents.Little Johnny to his mom: I shot 4 goals at the soccer match today!Mom: Wonderful, looks like your team won, right?Little Johnny: Not really, we played 2:2.Little Johnny plays shoot the apple from the head with his friends.The first shot lands directly in his eye. Share with your friends and colleagues and be the life of the party! Its never boring to read little Johnny jokes.Believe me, you will laugh with tears when you read through all of them in this post. Laughter is the best medicine in the world. You can also have a look at BEST Butt Jokes That Are Just Booty-ful. Johnny asks, "Do you know what I think?" She replies, "No". Keep smiling and join us on Social, we'd love to have you over. Not really sure what was going on, she showed Little Johnny. When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. has an "r" after !Johnny: The dog refused to.Little Johnny asks the teacher, Mrs Roberts, can I be punished for something I havent done?Mrs Roberts is shocked, Of course not, Johnny, that would be very unfair!Little Johnny is relieved, OK Mrs Roberts, sorry, I havent done my homework.Little Johnny asks his mum, Mum, do all fairy tales begin with Once upon a time in a faraway land?No darling, says his mother, somewhat distressed, Sometimes, they can begin with Ive got too much work in the office tonight, Ill come home later.Little Johnny comes home and tells his daddy, Dad, tomorrow theres a special Adults evening at school.Daddy is surprised, Really? Johnny pokes her in the ass with the pin again and Sally screams if you stick that thing in me one more time Im gonna break it! The teacher faints. Sexual orientation: sexually disorientated. Its true that I would like a husband of my own someday. What do you get if you try to cross a mouse with a skunk? I told the teacher that I went to your funeral.A teacher asks Little Johnny what he wants to be when he grows up.I want to be a detective and follow in my fathers footsteps, says Johnny.Thats very admirable of you, says the teacher. I see why they kicked him out of there." Dirty Little Johnny Jokes Collection Who wants some dirty jokes? Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom, "Are Fred and Mary up yet?" Yes, Johnny replies.The mother is now angry and immediately phones Johnnys teacher, What on earth are you teaching my son in class? she asks.The teacher replies, Right now, we are learning mathematical addition.The mother asks, And are you teaching them to say one plus six, that son of a bitch is seven?After the teacher stopped laughing hysterically, she answers, What I taught them to say was, one plus six, the sum of which is seven.The teacher was trying to put to use her recent psychology education.She asked everyone in her class, Alright, if any of you think you are stupid, please stand up!A few seconds pass by and then Little Johnny stands up.Startled, the teacher says, Oh, do you think youre stupid,Little Johnny? No, Miss, but I didnt want to leave you standing all alone!Teacher asks Little Johnny, Johnny, how old is your father?Hes as old as me, Johnny informs her.Now how would that be possible? inquires the surprised teacher.Well he became father the day I was born.. Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime Little Johnny always takes the nickel. So he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more. Most of his jokes involve a female counterpart. I told her yesterday that I had to go to your funeral., This week in Little Johnnys English class, they were learning about punctuation. Would anyone else like to try?Little Johnny raises his hand and stands to give his answer.Our mean next door neighbor was painting her house by hand, and my dad said it would take the contagious.In the class the teacher said: the first person to answer my question will go home early.Little Johnny threw his bag outside.Teacher asked: Whose bag is that?? A few days later the regular teacher is still sick when Little Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew out of the basket and onto the road." Who wants some dirty jokes? Lets have a look at the list of the best little Johnny jokes! They reply, "Oh, we got him straight from heaven." Johnny said, "Jeez. Johnny tried to buy a toy car with monopoly money at the store. Teacher, urinate. I love silly, funny, nerdy, quirky jokes. she coaxed. I never want you to use language like that again. Not really sure what was going on, she showed Little Johnny. He asks, "Do you know what I think?" "Well did you get it for Christmas then?" Johnny asked. "But Dad, it wasn't my fault. Ones blue, but the other is green.Little Johnny: Im not sure. the first letter." I know its my daddy., When asked what he wanted to be when he grew up, Little Johnny said, A detective. Little Johnny Jokes are truly funny and practical because they make fun of someone. You put your head in a cube and the scissors cut whatever hairstyle you wish.Mom: But how would that work, Johnny? What did he say?He said, Hey, Marie, make sure you wash my socks tomorrow. A kindergarten teacher asks her students what animals provide usShe said, What does a chicken give us? and the students replied, Eggs.She then asked, What does a pig give us? and the students replied a joyous Bacon.Finally she asked What does a cow give us? and before anyone could answer little Johnny said Homework.Little Johnny and a little girl are playing.Little Johnny pulls down his shorts and says, I have one of these and you dont.The little girl starts crying and crying and runs home to her mother.The next day Little Johnny and the girl are playing together again.Once again Little Johnny points to his private parts and says, I have one of these and you dont.But this time the little girl just keeps on playing.How come youre not crying today, asks Little Johnny.My mother told me, says the little girl, pulling up her dress, that with one of these, I can get as many of those as I want.Little Johnny skipped school one dayand since his house was next to his school, the teacher decided to visit Little Johnnys parents the next day after school, but his granddad was the only adult home.When he saw the teacher coming he said Johnny! 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